If you’ve ever wondered about how many Jedi you’d need to defeat a medieval army, you don’t have to wonder anymore.
Granted, this might be one of the stupidest questions ever posed. Just think, Jedi are magical beings of pure fiction, while “medieval soldiers” could refer to fighters from dozens of different cultures. Still, it’s a question worth answering, right?
Enter Ultimate Epic Battle Simulator, a brilliant piece of software that lives up to its name. For the low, low price of $15.99, the program lets users build fantastic armies and fight them against each other.
Granted, the creators of Ultimate Epic Battle Simulator don’t have the rights to Star Wars, but it’s hard to see “laser sword hero” as anything but a Jedi. As for the actual battle, well, it’s…something.
The real appeal of “Ultimate Epic Battle Simulator” is its technology.
Here’s how the game’s creators describe it:
Create massive battles with absolutely no limits. Want to see 10,000 chickens fight an army of Romans?? Sure, why not. Want to see a company of WW2 U.S soldiers
The bad news is that the program’s artificial intelligence isn’t exactly mind blowing. Its jedis—sorry, “laser sword heroes”—easily mow down the oncoming troops, which don’t bother using established battle maneuvers to flank their opponents.
This is a bit more of a problem with another fan-made video, “300 Jedi vs. 80,000 Zombies.” Yes, this game’s pretty insane.
The software is an impressive feat of engineering, even if it’s a little ridiculous (okay, it’s completely ridiculous). As you might have noticed, however, it’s not without technical issues. The game engine slows down quite a bit when tens of thousands of units are on screen.
“The main focus in this game is giving the player no restrictions to what he can do,” the creators explain. “That is why we decided not to limit
If you’re looking to melt down your computer’s graphics card, this seems to be the perfect app. If you’re looking for historical accuracy, well, we’ll remind you that this is a battle simulator with chickens and zombies.
The most amazing aspect of this game is its popularity on YouTube.
Videos like “5,000 Jedi vs. 40,000 U.S. Soldiers” have hundreds of thousands of views. Never mind the fact that they’re practically unwatchable due to extreme amounts of lag.
Move away from the Jedis, however, and it’s a bit harder to attract views. Take “25,000 Germans vs. 20,000 T-Rex,” which has a mere 28,000 views.
In case you’re wondering, the Germans don’t do too well. YouTube commenters were quick to point out the Germans’ poor battle formation.
Regardless of the historical accuracy, these videos are addicting. See for yourself how the 25,000 Germans fare against the 20,00 T-rex below.